What do I want?

Lately I've been trying to formulate this question, and today in a meeting I attended, I was able to verbalize something I've been pondering for awhile: Do I want the ministries I'm involved with to be open to all-regardless of commitment of the members, or do I want to help facilitate ministries that "require" commitment? How do we encourage others to want to commit? Doesn't everyone get MORE out of a group/ministry when they whole heartedly participate? We can't demand that everyone show up to the small group, or participate in a ministry. But for those that choose to "drop-in and drop out" how do I react?

I love being part of a group where everyone is on the "same page." That doesn't mean that everyone in the group agrees on every topic and we all say, "oh yes" and nod like robots. But doesn't it feel good when you're in a group that has a common purpose, a common goal, a sense of accountability to one another?! I know that is what I'm longing for.

I'm slowly learning the difference between being a "minister" and being ministered too. Often I think I try to combine the two, and then feel a sense of disappointment in my ability to do both. My love for control often has me looking to be in a place of leadership so I can direct the "mission." God says, "Be still and know that I am God."