When Did We Get This Rich?

A couple of weeks ago I had a company come out and give me an estimate on how much it would cost to clean out all of our ducts and vents. My parents had this done and thought it was great. Less dust, less dusting-BIG plus, fresher indoor air quaility-what's not to love. So, the guy gave me the spiel and left me his card along with some web addresses I could go look up to see how well qualified their company was to do this kind of work. He left and I took a double- take at the estimate: $725.00. WHAT- Seven Hundred and Twenty-Five dollars to take a giant vacuum and suck out all the construction debris and dust, just so I can "breath better and dust less often." Well, maybe, I mean cleaner air must be healthier air-and health is always good for my family right? I do NOT like dusting, as anyone in my household can atest to. And spending less time dusting means more quality time with the kids right? Who am I kidding, how often do I dust?

I thought about it for about 3 minutes, I mulled it over, called my dad to see if indeed they had payed such a handsome sum for this service. (They had.) I called Alan to see if he just thought this was as crazy as I did. Sometimes I'm so wrong about these things. And in the end, I didn't make an appointment for a professional cleaning for one simple reason-I'm cheap. I'd much rather spend that much money on something fun or something essential-like say food or our house payment.

Then today, about a month or so after this episode I was vacuuming Toby (our dog) hair and dust from the wood floors and the thought occured to me: I bet most of the world can't even fathom paying that much to rid themselves of unwanted dust. Millions live in shacks with dirt floors, no plumbing, no windows. Millions of children live in homes where they've never owned a vacuum, let alone a furnace and heat pump, air conditioning, vent systems, duct work... And yet I actually entertained the idea of spending $725.00 on less dust. That fact hurts. It hurts that I am so attached to this home, to the need for cleanliness and order that I am crazily out of touch with most of the world's population. I don't know accurate facts and figures about poverty, homelessness, hunger and disease. But I do know that my children are well fed, have a mighty big roof over their head and never go to sleep wondering if the dust on the dresser is going to harm them. When my children are thirsty at night I get them a cup of filtered cold water from our fridge. They drink never once fearing they might get a disease that will give them diarrhea and eventually kill them.

I want to go on and on, but I think you get the idea. We're rich, comparatively. How do I accept this with the kind of gratefulness that it requires? How do I teach my children what gifts they've been given just by being born into this family? How do I do this when I am yet so far from truly understanding what it means to be blessed? And yet, is a home (a fairly clean, yet pretty dusty home) the definition of blessed? Blessed are the meek for they will inherit the earth. What do millions-perhaps billions of families understand and value that I don't?

I have to close this by saying, Mom, Dad, I don't think you are wrong, or dumb or insensitive to the plight of others by getting your "ducts sucked." I don't want to make anyone feel like I'm pointing fingers. Many of my friends know how much we've spent on things like concert tickets and my heavy duty vacuum and our teak floors. I think everyone picks and chooses what they feel is of value or importance to them. The day before Alan left for China he decided to go and get one pair of navy slacks for the trip-we came home with about gulp $400.00 in new clothes and some other random stuff from Freddies. My point is, how do we choose these things, and why do we choose them? Or are we so "rich" that we don't even really actively choose-we just do it.

God, I'm struggling with how to pray about this. I feel stupid for even saying I'm strugging with this idea of money and blessing and what is all means. But you see it all, and I want to share this part of my life with others for the simple act of being obedient to your Spirit.